Author Archives: Amanda

RSWL: Family Dinners

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Okay, this may be a stretch for a Random Stuff We Like entry, and may even be borderline TMG Philosphy.  I’m going to do it here, today, anyway.  

We recently celebrated a birthday dinner with my husband’s family, and then, of course, we were with family for Mother’s Day.   As I reflected on each of these dinners, I started to think about how special these family dinners are.   They may even be endangered. 

I’m not talking about nightly meals with those in our home.  I mean the dinners that bring members of your extended family together.  Though the occasion and participants vary, my husband and I have the opportunity to gather in this way at least once a month, if not more.  Whether it is his family, my family or both combined, we can count on these gatherings.   In our hectic and crazy busy lives, sometimes this opportunity feels like a chore, a burden.  However, I always get something out of the interactions, and am grateful that my children are now getting the chance to experience these family meals.  

We don’t just eat and leave.  We sit.  We talk.  We work together, cook together, laugh and sometimes cry together.  We even fight together for that occasional family drama encounter. Here, smart phones, tablets, television and social media don’t exist.  Here, we practice the art of conversation.  We ask questions, we listen.  With all the attention-sucking, hypnotizing gadgets being crammed down our throats, it is nice to sit around a table, practice our manners, argue over the last biscuit, and laugh at the same jokes over and over.  Here, family tales grow bigger.  Here, legends are told.  Here memories are made. 

A Family Dinner

A Family Dinner

Invariably, pictures are taken, capturing mouthfuls of food, children picking noses, parents yawning, awkward glances and hearty laughter.   These snapshots of time become a record of our family growing together.  These snapshots are shared with those loved ones not with us.   These snapshots capture time to be passed down to the next generations. 

Maybe, just maybe, these gatherings full of home-cooked food and love offer a reprieve from the rush of everyday life.  They might serve to offer extra support and love to family members that are hurting, or encouragement to those in need. Rituals are shared and taught.   New boyfriends or girlfriends are introduced and embarrassed, announcements are made, and identities are formed.  

In sharing our joys, stories, jokes, trials, frustrations, and even recipes, we share parts of ourselves with each other and deepen our roots.  That’s what makes family dinners and gatherings one of those things we love.  What’s for dinner? 

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Nate’s Notes: Put. The. Toys. Down. Now.

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It’s no secret I love my toys.  What warm-blooded kid wouldn’t?  I can share them when I need to…but  mostly I feel like I don’t need to share them.  Doesn’t everyone have their own toys?  Someone should tell Momma this, because she keeps taking mine.   It wouldn’t be so bad if she was playing with them…with me.  You think she is playing with them though?  No. I’ll give you one guess as to what she is doing with MY toys.  Yep…taking pictures.  PICTURES!!  Please.  Spare me. 

When does it end?   She tells me to not worry, and to focus on the bigger picture.  Like I know what that is.  Please, I’m 1 ½.  My bigger picture entails baths, warm nighttime bottles, timely diaper changes, snacks and … oh yea, TOYS!!   I just stare at her, blinking away the horror.  I cross my arms, puff out my chest, stare some more, trying to communicate my message:   Put. The. Toys. Down. Step. Away.  Clearly, she can’t read my body language.  And she calls herself an anthropologist.  Pfff.   She then tells me I’m helping “them” with photos for the new Imagery website.  Like I care. 

My toys...not hers.

My toys…not hers.

Another toy.

Another toy.

Just walk away.

Just walk away.

When will it end!!!????

When will it end!!!????

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don’t care.  But, I notice she missed all my blocks and trains, so I carry them over to her.  “Bocks, bocks…twain”, I suggest in the most uninterested tone I can muster, followed by a yawn.  Hey, if you can’t beat “them”, might as well join “them”…or pretend to.  If I could only get my hands on that camera, or at least beat it with my blocks.  Hmmmm….And what is this Imagery website anyway?  Wait…does this mean even more pictures!!!???!!!  Oh, poop.   No…I really just did. 

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TMG Philosophy: Discipline

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Not to sound like a broken record, but once again I’m going to parallel life to Nate, our 19-month old boy, with TMG Philosophy!  As a relatively new parent, I am learning so much about life and myself by raising our son!  Especially when it comes to discipline. 

Discipline gets a bad rap.  It just does.  You bring up discipline in a conversation and most people assume you are referencing punishment.  When I talk about having discipline in my toddler son’s daily routine, people raise one eyebrow, look at me sympathetically and say, not ask, “Oh, he gets in trouble a lot does he.”  Ummm…negative Ghostrider.   In fact, discipline keeps him out of trouble and daily crisis for the most part.  And me.   The way I see it, discipline involves what could be seen as a consequence to a choice made.  A cause and effect.   I guess this is what most people would call punishment.   Discipline also has rewards then.   A positive outcome for a choice made.  In a moment of no self-discipline, when I choose to take 10 times (instead of 3) to tell Nate to stop something that isn’t acceptable, I usually get a category 6 tantrum (his, not mine) and a resistant, boundary-testing boy for the rest of the day.   When Nate chooses to throw his cars at his baby sister over and over, he knows he has to put the cars away.   When he chooses to stop throwing  after I ask him to,  he gets to keep playing with them, and then usually moves onto something else fun. 

In our home, we think discipline is a virtue that brings out the good and shows the strength within, no matter what age or who you are.  We know it takes consistency and respect for physical, emotional and spiritual guidelines.  We know that without these guidelines, we may survive in life, but we most definitely won’t thrive.  And that just isn’t okay.  Of course, this doesn’t mean our lives are all unicorns and rainbows all the time.  It’s hard.  It takes effort.  It takes commitment.  It means we have to discipline ourselves just as often as we do our son.   There are failed attempts.  Many.  But in those moments of success, we have such contentment, and we learn and we grow.  We grow as individuals, as partners, and as a family.   We learn a little bit more about who we are and who we do (or do not) want to become.  I think that makes discipline pretty cool. 

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Nate’s Notes: What IS SHE Doing Here?

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Daddy holding both of us.

Daddy holding both of us.

I love making friends and having visitors.  I love it when my cousins visit me and play with me.  I love meeting people.  I knew this at a very young age when I had to distract people from thinking Momma was crazy for taking pictures of tree bark, door knobs, dirt or walls.  I mean, seriously, who takes THAT many pictures of a concrete wall?  This became about survival people.  Survival.  That’s when Momma started calling me Prince Charming and her little social butterfly.  She could learn a thing or two from me, that’s for sure.  That’s why I try to engage just about everyone I meet in stores, restaurants, banks, churches, and parks.

Anyway, you can imagine I was thrilled to have a new friend when Momma and Daddy introduced me to Lyla one day.  A new friend!    She is way smaller and younger than I am.  She can’t even sit up or walk!  Sheesh. What a baby.

Harvested oranges...I was just trying to help.

Harvested oranges…I was just trying to help.

So we met her one day…and then visited her the next day.   And pretty much each day after I woke up for the morning, we talked about Lyla.  Lyla this, Lyla that.  Oh Lyla.  Baby Lyla.  Umm…HELLOOOO!!!????  I’m Nate.  Hey, look what I can do!  Walk- talk- read books- build things- dance- harvest oranges.  Do I need to keep going?   Fine, I’ll conjugate verbs; that should get your attention.   As if talking about Lyla all the time wasn’t enough, she started visiting at my house.  MY house.  I think she got lost, or her people forgot about her because she is STILL here!!!  What is she STILL doing here???   I mean, she’s not so bad.   She is really cute and all, but she doesn’t DO anything.  She is kind of blobby.  I tell her my best jokes, invite her to play with my cars, but she just blows bubbles and spits up and stares.  I tried to show Lyla how to play with my bouncy balls, but they kind of just bounced off her head.  What DOES she do??   Momma and Daddy have to pay attention to her a lot, but she is small enough that they can hold both of us.   I wonder how long she will be here?

She can't even read!

She can’t even read!

RSWL: Roadtrip- West Sonoma County, California

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One of the hardest parts of my job at The Transmogrifier is the numerous field adventures I absolutely MUST take in order to take photos for our texture and imagery websites.  It’s just torture having to explore cities, sites, and towns near and far.  I dread waking up and searching for all that beauty.  Okay, so it is actually amazing, something I am grateful for each day.  Something that has changed the way I look at life and what happens around me. 

One of these recent adventures took me and my little family on the back roads of Sonoma County.  From our house, we drove out Westside Road past budding vineyards with happy spring wildflowers waving as we passed.   Landmark barns and beautiful winery structures begged to be photographed. Eventually, hundreds of shots later (again, we mean camera shots, not liquor shots), we connected with River Road, where we followed the Russian River all the way to Highway 1.  Before joining the coast highway, we passed the infamous winery, Korbel, and the Armstrong Redwoods grove.   As we traveled south along the rugged coastline, we passed beach shacks, crashing waves, and seaside ice plants.   More pictures were taken.   By this time, our 1 ½ year old, Nate, looked completely dismayed and determined to get his hands on our cameras so that he might dismantle them.  He told us this in many words, half of which are clear, the other half guttural. 

Sonoma County Barn

Sonoma County Barn

Sonoma County Barn

Sonoma County Barn

Sonoma County Barn

Sonoma County Barn

Off of Highway 1, we circled back inland through the town of Bodega with its charming cemetery and famous schoolhouse building from Alfred Hitchcock’s film, The Birds.   This Highway 12 carried us past sprawling ranches and farms with proud farm equipment, timeless barns, cattle and sheep dotting the open land.   Large rocks and majestic oak trees covered the rolling Sonoma County hills as we approached home.

Despite Nate’s protests, we arrived home content from our Sonoma County road trip and well satisfied with the number of photographs.   These roads and their scenery make them just one of those random things we like.   If you are ever in Sonoma County, these idyllic backroads are a MUST for your camera and your soul.  

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Nate’s Notes: Chickeeeeen!

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I love chickens!  They are super!! And super pretty.  Have you ever seen them up close? Their feathers are popular with Momma and her camera. She says that their feathers have great texture.   Our Ladies are still growing, just like me.  We had some older ladies, but Momma and Daddy said a beast of the night took them.  That’s not very nice if you ask me.  I’m suspicious of their disappearance though.  After all, I have seen Chicken Run.  I know the Ladies make plans to escape, go on holiday and what not. And… I did see some pencils, notepads and rope in the chicken pen before they disappeared.

Anyway, we got baby baby chickens, and I watched them grow on our back deck in a container until they were old enough to move into the chicken pen. Now I get to watch them run around in the chicken pen…which is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.  Have you ever seen a chicken run?  It will make all the  “no’s” and “you can’t do that’s” you hear in a day vanish, leaving only a smile on your face and a giggle in your heart.  You almost forget that you aren’t allowed to bounce their white ball thingies that they hide under their butts!

Here are some pictures of grown Ladies from our cousins in Oregon.  When ours grow up, they’ll be travel agents, designers, teachers and stunt doubles.  What?!  Oh…I meant to say that when ours grow up they’ll look like these.

Chickens Running...Oh man. It's the best!!!

Chickens Running…Oh man. It’s the best!!!

Run Ladies, Run!!

Run Ladies, Run!!

TMG Philosophy: The Art of Distraction

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My 19-month old boy, Nate, fills my days with joy and adventure, along with a sprinkling of challenges and humbling encounters.   I’ve learned, either by listening to wise family or by trial and error, that distraction is key to survival.  Okay, maybe that’s melodramatic.  But if distraction isn’t the key to survival, then at the very least it IS key to thriving.  Every day, I make it a goal to help myself and my family thrive, not just survive.  (See Daniel J. Siegel’s book “The Whole Brained Child” or watch for me to discuss it in RSWL!)  In order to thrive with Nate, I try to head off unnecessary tantrums (Nate’s, not mine) while setting boundaries and guidelines.  When Nate seems to lack any bones, and melts on the floor while screaming bloody murder because his crayon broke or the bananas stayed at the store, I distract him with silly questions.  I ask him where his frog is…if it has a name.  I ask him if he heard the helicopter or saw the elephant.  I ask him anything that will distract him!   When this happens in public, I breathe, and remind myself that the part of his developing brain that regulates emotions and decisions is still under construction.  Then I work on mastering the art of distraction and redirecting.

Most of the time, I feel pretty good at the end of a day about helping Nate, and in turn, myself, survive the day and thrive.  However, this past week’s news feed, from Boston to Texas to China and everything in between, admittedly left me a little cheerless and feeling anything but thriving.  The daily television, radio and internet coverage of sickening and saddening headlines not only made me shake my head, but also created an uneasy pit in my stomach.  My heart has been heavy all week, my mind scattered, my emotions right at surface level.  I didn’t even seek out the news, but it seemed each time I was watching a program or listening to a song, the damn ticker tape at the bottom of the screen or the interrupting radio broadcast added more weight.   And this didn’t even include the personal struggles being hurled at my family.  It was so bad I didn’t even want to take any pictures!  The negative band-wagon came to my front door, and I jumped right on board.   

How was I supposed to focus?  Furthermore, how was I supposed to stay focused on what is good and joyful in my life?  Each time I asked myself these questions (and it was often), a little Nate tugged on my pants asking me to color, read a book or play with cars.   I brushed him aside, though, dazed by a general lack of enthusiasm.   How dare he interrupt my negative stupor!   After about the zillionth time of my frustrated sigh and asking him why he insisted on distracting me, my thick skull registered what was happening.   When I needed it most, my little guy, one of the joys in my life, was trying to redirect me.  He was the perfect distraction from the negative to absolute delight.  I have a frog; his name is Nate.

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Nate’s Notes: Left Behind

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Last week Uncle Tim and new friends, Jon and Tina, came to visit us.  I already knew I liked Uncle Tim because he is going to help with my tree fort.  Tina and Jon…I liked them instantly for their laughs and kind faces.  They played with my cars and trucks and bouncy balls.  They sat at my level and smiled a lot.  Pretty much they were super cool.  At least I THOUGHT they were cool.  And then…

They pulled out cameras.  Just like Momma.  My head started to hurt.  My eyes watered.  NOOOOO!!!  Not you guys too??!!   Had Momma gotten to them too?  Or were they all to blame for Momma and her cameras? Even Daddy had a camera.  Not only did they come with cameras, they talked about cameras, and pictures, and textures, and numbers of pictures. Strike one.  Go ahead…feel sorry for me.  You better sit down though; it gets worse.

I pretended not to care too much about the cameras, though I had to stop myself from “accidentally” spilling my drink cup on them. I could totally use toddler clumsiness to explain that away.  However, my self control seems to be increasing, darn it. I had begun to accept this cameras-everywhere-world as they discussed our field adventure for the next day.  We were going to explore Mare Island.  I had heard Momma and Daddy talk about how cool this place was.  I was going to see cool rust patterns, pretty broken glass, gauges, old brick buildings, burned wood, great colors and peeling paint.  I was going to see a big big crane-claw for the first time!  Okay, let me grab my camera too, pathetic as it is.  Let’s go!

The next day came, and I woke up early, ready for the adventure ahead.  Momma announced it was time to go, and then Grandma Sue was at the door.  Wow, she is coming too!!!  This will be great.  Maybe Papa and Gram will be there too!!!   And Daddy!  Oh man, I almost peed it was that exciting.  Self control folks, self control.   And then Momma left…and I stayed.  She left.  She left me home.  She left me behind!  She left me behind to be with THEM!  Strike two…

Photo taken without me. Broken glass...LIKE MY HEART.

Photo taken without me. Broken glass…LIKE MY HEART.

Peeling-Paint_286

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Like I said, I THOUGHT they were cool.  As if all this wasn’t bad enough, they all came to MY home, after I had been left behind, and talked about the adventure at Mare Island!  Yep, they ate pizza and drooled over the images they captured with those cameras.

One more strike.  They have one more strike.  They are on thin ice if you ask me.  I’m all broken up over this.

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RSWL: Photojojo Store

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I stumbled upon this fun, online store when I was looking for unique Christmas gifts last winter.  I ONLY window shopped…but filled my cart with items I loved.  I exercised impeccable self-control, even if I did refill the cart with the same, and more, items on many occasions!  It might even be time to revisit this unique store!

Even if you only dabble in photography, chances are someone in your life could be a photo geek (which, by the way, is equivalent to super cool).  Well, then you really should mosey on over to this website for the Photojojo Store!

Some of the fun items:

  • Kitchen timer disguised as a zoom lens.  Be careful!  Don’t grab the wrong lens when you head out to shoot your photos (Tee hee…okay, maybe only I would do that.)
  • Canon and Nikon photo lens coffee mugs!
  • Film Roll salt and pepper shakers
  • Shot Glass lens set
  • Stylish camera satchels and bags
  • A Three-Way camera strap: allows you to wear your camera around your neck, your wrist, or your waist!
  • Phone photo accessories
  • Camera accessories galore!
  • And…so much more!   
Kitchen Timer

Kitchen Timer

Maybe I should leave a wish list.  Hmmm…In any case, happy browsing and shopping!

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Nate’s Notes: What Do You Mean I Don’t Know How To Do That?

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I have so many plans! Big plans! Plans that get squashed like bananas in the couch.  Plans that get flattened like cereal puffs under my feet.  Plans that get tossed like the dirt I throw over my head.   Why?  Give me a second to calm myself before I answer…

My plans mostly don’t happen because I hear, “You don’t know how to do that.”, or worse, “You aren’t old enough yet, sweetie.”  Sweetie?  You wouldn’t call me that if you knew what I was thinking right now.  Hmmmph.

How am I supposed to learn how to do “that” if I don’t try?  I am not asking to drive the truck or anything…not this week.  I just want to climb a few things, take apart and rebuild Momma’s camera,  attempt flying with my super-hero-in-training cape, take photos to contribute to the website, start the fireplace, and give the dogs a bath.  Those are just SOME examples of my dashed dreams.  Instead, I get plastic toys, cardboard books, and blunt crayons.  Have you ever tried staying in the lines with huge, blunt crayons?  Impossible!! Simply impossible!!!  And I’m guessing Mommas feels threatened by the superb quality of my photos.

Here he comes to save the day! Super baby!

Here he comes to save the day! Super baby!

Momma is always encouraging me to try new things, but then she tells me I might get hurt when I propose MY plans.  Well it’s hurting me not to try!   Both Momma and Daddy tell me it is okay to make mistakes as long as I try.  Well, I think it’s a mistake to NOT let me try MY plans!  Hmmmphh…the audacity.  Momma says Daddy has gumption and he tries things he doesn’t know how to do all the time. How come he gets to but I don’t??? (They think I’m not listening.) Well, once I figured out gumption didn’t mean I have to go to the doctor, I realized I have it too!  What good is having gumption if I don’t get to use it?  What about MY plans?  Work with me people!